I spent years of my life searching for a label that I could call a profession or career. I just didn’t know what I wanted to be and it drove me nuts.
After school I went to agriculture college and studied fish farming and fishery management between 1994-1997, because I didn’t know what else to do and I loved fishing and the countryside. But I burnt out the hobby I had been so passionate about for years and I was back to square one.
I then took a myers briggs type indicator test after college at 19 to try and figure out what box I would fit into best. It said working in hotels and the service industry would be best, but that didn’t feel right
So I decided to work part-time for my step fathers bill printing company on the factory floor, just while I figured stuff out. I ended up staying for nearly 2 years and worked my way up to the systems department and became a computer programmer and then later moved onto another company as a web developer.
Not long after that I realised that I had no interest in building my programmer resume and I should get out before I got found out for having inadequate computer geek skills.
Travelling to Thailand, Indonesia and going up and down the east coast of Australia in a van seemed like the right thing to do next. The perfect distraction that would help me avoid having to answer the question, what should I do with my life?
I then thought the easy come, easy go life as a professional model would be a great way to live for the next 6 years, until I found myself in thousands of pounds of debt, became very ill in the process and had my large intestine removed.
Then in 2009 I finally found myself and realised my inner geek, at the grand old age of 30. My passionate obsession for training and fitness was the way forward and the label of Personal Trainer felt like the well fitted suit I’d always been looking for. The search for my value and identity was finally over.
Until 2021, I brought out my first book ‘Plant Powered’ and it felt like suddenly the Vegan Personal Trainer suit didn’t fit me anymore. So I entered another well earned existential crisis, shit not again!!
For all those years I’d been busy comparing myself to family members and friends, the jobs, careers, houses and cars they owned and judged myself harshly for not having or being the same, I’d been desperate to find a box that I would fit into.
It took me until 2022 before I recognised my own inner greatness, as I was stripped of all labels and indentities, and fell into free fall.
I brought out my new book ‘The Journey to the Centre of Your Soul’, my online self-discovery coaching program ‘Inner Earth’ and went off to South America for 3 months.
Without a label to cling onto and little money, I had to rely on life providing for me through the angels of friends and family members, who showed up continuously at just the right times and who helped keep me going with cash injections, just enough but not too much.
I returned home to the UK three months later, with a deep understanding of myself and what I want in my life now.
I’m living with my folks (again!), supporting and being of service to them through some recent health issues, working part time in the village coffee shop, whilst I start the building of my coaching business and I’ve never been more excited for what’s to come, because I’ve let go of a very heavy weight that I’ve been carrying for years.
I’ve had to let go of control and it’s been hard, but life has showed me the value of who I am and what I bring to the human experience, before and beyond a career, profession or identity.
People have asked me what I do recently and if I’m honest I’m not really sure. I just know that I have an impact on everyone I meet and everyone who reads or hears my words, there’s a deep value in who I am and people feel it and are transformed by it.
I don’t know what you call that or even how to describe it, it also makes me feel a bit uneasy expressing it out loud in public, so for now I’ve just chosen ‘Author and Life Journey Facilitator’ to make myself and others feel more comfortable.
I understand it and am embracing it now, although I still have work to do before I feel fully comfortable with it.
The Roles We Play
The Avatar role you choose to play out in this life time makes no difference to the impact you have on the world around you.
Your career, job or profession does not add or detract from the intrinsic value of you and the power you have to change someone’s day or life.
That opportunity exists in every moment and in every interaction.
Bring awareness of the power of you into every meeting you have, every person you touch, for a long or a short period of time.
Even looking into someone’s eye, offering a smile or a knowing glance of ‘you got this, I see you’, will send transformative ripples out into the energetic field that informs all manifestation.
Just being you, was, is and will always be enough.
If you fancy going on a magical journey with me to unleash the dormant powers within you, then checkout my 25% OFF Christmas Deals for my Inner Earth program here…